Mom Continues to Have Shortness of Breath

They didn't do an EKG on Mom at the doctor's today, as he was out of town; they just told her to stay on the new drugs, the Lasix and the Losartan, in addition to the Coumadin and the other things. Argh. I am hoping we don't have to go to the ER for an EKG over Easter weekend! She is having a hard time with the panting, and trying to catch her breath with just walking. It calms down when she sits though, after a bit.

Once again I went over there to spend time with her this evening, and once again I helped her get ready for bed and tucked her in and stayed with her till her breathing got better after tackling the stairs. It was very sweet and companionable. I brought her a new pillow, the denim one with arms that Terry got for me when I was so sick. She liked it.

At one point I lay my head against her shoulder on the pillow and we chatted about various memories of boat trips and hiking trips. We watched her neighbor in his room as I guess she does every night. Looking at the photos and things around her bedroom, she said "What are you going to do with all these rocks?" I said "I love these rocks." She said "You didn't answer me." I picked up a picture of the two of us when I was three, rowing in the dinghy at Indian Point, and said that it looked like my whole childhood. She agreed.

I don't want to answer her when she talks about dying; about not being here and asking me what I am going to do with the house, etc. She is thinking this is it, that she won't get better from this, and I guess I am hoping very hard that she is wrong.

She has lost a great deal of weight, she is 130+ instead of her usual 143. They say it is losing the water weight, but I worry. Vomiting does not help. She said the nurse said she will get her appetite back soon. I sure hope so. She looks strong but I don't want her to lose more.

My brother called her today and it pleased her very much. Rob had to yell at him for three days to get him to call her yesterday, but I gather today he called on his own. I hope he actually comes to town in two weeks.

God bless us, every one, on Good Friday. May Easter bring all who suffer healing grace.